Create the love you've always imagined at Date with Destiny

< Back to all stories

Date With Destiny

The law of polarity in relationships

How to embrace your natural energy and ignite passion

Posted by: Team Tony

You couldn’t stand being away from your partner at the beginning of your relationship. You thought about them all the time. You were physically near them whenever possible. Why is that? It’s because there was an initial spark, an enormous sense of passion, that was binding you two together. This spark is caused by the law of polarity in relationships.

 Over time, you’ve found that that passion has fizzled. You still love your partner, but your relationship is lacking the magnetic attraction it once had. One thing is certain: Love is not enough. You need both love and passion for your relationship to work.

What helps create passion? Relationship polarity.

The law of polarity in relationships

Relationship polarity is the ultimate key to passion. In any successful relationship that has an intimate connection and sexual attraction, there is polarity. What does this mean exactly?

Polarity in relationships is the spark that occurs between two opposing energies: masculine and feminine. Gender does not affect whether you have masculine or feminine energy. Couples can be the same or opposite sex, but in order for the pairing to work, one partner has to provide the masculine energy while the other brings the feminine. The primary driving force behind masculine energy is working toward a direction or goal, while feminine energy seeks emotional fulfillment and connection.

When a relationship depolarizes, you don’t feel the connection you used to because both of you have developed the same type of energy, be it masculine or feminine. This can happen in a variety of ways. A masculine partner can become more feminine when they are required to take on the role of caretaker in the relationship, and a feminine partner can become more masculine when they’re tasked with leading the charge in major decisions or confronting stressful situations. When your relationship polarity becomes too similar, passion dies. Now what do you have? In place of what was once a sexy, fun, amazing relationship is now a friendship.

Here’s what Tony has to say:

Whether you want to save your relationship, reignite a lost sense of passion or are single but want to learn how to find the ideal partner, attending Date with Destiny can help you. Date with Destiny is an annual six-day event that will help you understand the forces that drive your behaviors and thoughts, including the law of polarity in relationships.

Relationship polarity: Embrace your energy

Have you ever held two magnets together? You know that similar energies repel each other, but opposites attract. The same is true of masculine and feminine energies. Two people with similar energies can love each other, but they can never have passion. And single people who haven’t embraced their true core energy won’t attract a partner that is right for them. They need to identify their core energy and learn how to notice the energy of potential partners. When you know what you’re looking for in a relationship, it’s easier to find someone with compatible polarity and develop passion.

We all wear masks in life – we act differently as parents, as friends and as partners. We create masks to protect us from fear: The fear that we are not enough and the fear that we will not be loved are intensely powerful. Underneath the mask, our innate energy doesn’t change. But masks make it possible to give off an energy that is not our core essence. To make the law of polarity in relationships work for you, you must strip away the mask and embrace your natural energy.

For a woman with a feminine core, a mask is created by the following events:

Stage 1:

A little girl is born with a feminine essence.

Stage 2:

A little girl learns to create a masculine mask in childhood. This happens when either her mother teaches her never to become dependent on a man, or her father dominates and wants to make her stronger.

Stage 3:

A little girl learns to put a feminine mask over her masculine mask. This happens when a girl sees men attracted to other females who are truly feminine.

Stage 4:

A woman learns to put on a strong masculine mask. This happens when a woman gets hurt.

For a man with a masculine core, a mask is created by the following events:

Stage 1:

A little boy is born with a masculine essence.

Stage 2:

A little boy learns to create a feminine mask in childhood. This happens when he has a powerful father that dominates, or a mother who teaches that being masculine is bad and rewards pleasing behaviors.

Stage 3:

A little boy learns to put a masculine mask over his feminine mask. This happens when a boy realizes that he is not attracting females.

Stage 4:

A man learns to put on a strong feminine mask. This happens when a man has been hurt by women and learns to please them.

When you become able to embrace your true energy, be it masculine or feminine, you will be able to give your authentic self to your partner or to attract compatible partners with whom you share passion. This is the first step to creating relationship polarity. The next step is to examine your relationship itself.

How to create polarity in relationships

Think back on your current or past relationships. When did you stop working to create amazing times with your partner, and instead begin falling back on old, happy memories? You’re two completely different people, but at one point in time, you would do anything for each other.

If you’ve lost the passion, you can use the law of polarity in relationships to get it back – but it takes communication and trust. It can be a challenge for you to look at the current state of your relationship. Is it truly all it could be right now? Why not? If both you and your partner want to make this partnership work, what’s preventing you from doing so?

You must knock down the walls you’ve built up over time with your partner and gain an understanding of why you do the things you do. First identify the issues that create pain for your partner – and take responsibility for your role in them. Only then can you stop causing pain and start creating pleasure. If you’re single, you must use polarity in relationships to find the traits you need in a long-term partner, and learn how to sustain a healthy relationship once you’ve found your ideal significant other.

The ultimate expression of the law of polarity in relationships is sexual attraction and fulfillment.

To create relationship polarity – to have a fulfilling sexual relationship that is sustainable – you must truly embrace your partner’s energy.

For a person with feminine energy, if they feel unseen, feel unsafe or feel that they’re not understood, then there will be no sexual attraction for their masculine partner. Someone with masculine energy won’t feel a sexual tie to their partner if they feel overly criticized, controlled or that their partner is closed off to them. You have the power to give your partner what they need in the relationship. You have the power to create relationship polarity.

What is depolarization?

Depolarization occurs when one or both partners feel they need to put their “mask” back on. For example, if a partner questions the masculine partner’s direction (whether because they are lost while driving or are flailing with direction in life), it will create an instant collapse of the polarity. Similarly, if a feminine person is criticized for looking run down or worn out, this makes them feel less radiant and unloved, and they will start to shut down. As David Deida says, “Never tell a man with a masculine sexual essence that he is wrong, and never tell a woman with a feminine sexual essence that she is ugly.”

The law of polarity in relationships only works if both partners feel safe. If the feminine partner feels too insecure to relax into their femininity or the masculine partner is bent out of shape and loses his masculine backbone, the relationship depolarizes. Many couples spend years this way and get used to the loss of passion. However, attraction can shift in a matter of seconds – a woman could go from tight and controlling to free and radiant once her partner makes her feel appreciated, needed and loved.

To restore polarity in relationships, examine the issues in your life that have caused depolarization. Did a medical scare cause the partner with feminine energy to inhabit a more masculine role in the relationship? Was it a surprising affair that caused the masculine partner to feel unseen and insecure, traits more closely linked to feminine energy? Just because your relationship’s polarity has shifted, doesn’t mean it can’t be helped.

If your relationship is lacking polarity, you can learn how to get it back. If you’re single and still searching for your ideal mate, you can learn to understand what type of energy you bring to a relationship and what you attract in return. Once you’re clear in your purpose and recognize what’s gone wrong, you’ll discover how to use relationship polarity to feel fulfilled long-term.

Rekindle the lost spark by attending the six-day event that has already helped millions of people around the world. Reserve your spot today and prepare to watch your relationship change for the better.

Create the love you've always imagined at Date with Destiny