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Are you with the right person?

Tony explains the importance of selecting your partner consciously

One of the most important decisions you could ever make is the person you choose to spend the rest of your life with. Yet so many of us make this decision with blinders on – ignoring some of the most glaring red flags. And it is these red flags that often become very real issues in the relationship, and can lead you down a path of pain, suffering and heartbreak.

In this episode of the Real Breakthrough Series, we’re going back to one of Tony’s most intimate events, where he’s working with participants on building extraordinary relationships. While it may not sound particularly romantic, Tony shows us why love and passion are not the only things that matter when choosing your partner. In fact, he explains just why we must make a concerted effort to choose our partners consciously. And he even offers up the three most critical questions that we must ask ourselves when we are considering this important decision.

Love is not enough. It’s vital. And it’s what life partnerships are built upon. But in the end, it’s not enough. Because opposites may attract, but it’s those with similarities that bond. And if you’re looking to build a lifetime partnership – you must remember that the right person and the right connection are everything.


[01:11] Episode introduction
[02:25] Her husband wants a separation
[03:10] Feeling like a failure
[03:50] The questions you must ask
[04:10] Can they do the job?
[04:45] Will they do the job long term?
[05:05] Are the goals aligned?
[05:20] Tony’s search for a personal assistant
[09:25] Is their nature reinforced by the job
[09:55] Are they the right team fit?
[10:10] How Tony learned the importance of team fit
[10:30] Team fit comes down to human needs
[12:10] Love is not enough
[13:10] Her husband’s fears
[13:30] How each of their desires shifted
[14:50] Actions don’t always reflect the truth
[16:20] Understanding where her husband is coming from
[18:50] Frustration means something is still possible
[19:10] Weighing her options
[20:45] Envisioning life down each path
[22:00] Be mindful of judgment that blocks intimacy
[22:25] Exploring your options
[24:45] Looking within

Team Tony

Team Tony cultivates, curates and shares Tony Robbins’ stories and core principles, to help others achieve an extraordinary life.

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